Do I Need to Breastfeed?
No! You just need to make sure your baby is fed. How you ensure your little one has a full tummy is up to you (and your partner) alone. Whether you breastfeed, formula feed, pump and feed, or combo feed, do what you need to do, mama.
Why does everyone keep asking?!
I don’t know if this happens in other cultures or countries, but what I encountered in the US is right after a woman asks me how I’m doing, she immediately asks if I’m breastfeeding. There seems to be a societal fixation here on breastfeeding being the best food for a baby up until their first birthday.
Yes, there are a ton of nutrients in breastmilk and you can pass natural immunity to your baby against viruses while your baby is still very vulnerable. But, why is it anyone else’s business besides you and your healthcare professionals? I would even say it’s cruel to ask any new mom if they’re breastfeeding, since for many it’s not a choice. There are a multitude of reasons for why you may want or need to formula feed including a poor latch, flat nipples, pain, mental health, low supply, flexibility, and the list goes on.
Also, for new moms, breastmilk doesn’t usually come in for a few days and not everyone makes enough colostrum. That’s what happened for me – I had a few drops of colostrum but nothing substantial to feed our baby bao. In the hospital, I was totally okay with feeding her formula and I’m glad the staff didn’t pressure me to breastfeed only. I’ve heard horror stories of ladies being berated in other hospitals across the US for needing to breastfeed which actually starved their babies since either milk wasn’t in yet or their babies weren’t latching properly. Even with lactation consultations on hand, it doesn’t mean that breastfeeding comes easy.
If I don’t breastfeed, what are my other options?
Formula
There is absolutely nothing wrong with formula. As a matter of fact, many East Asians grew up on formula – I’m one of them and turned out perfectly fine, at least that’s what I like to think. 🙂 There are also many types of formula out there, some even mimicking breastmilk or colostrum. If you find your baby is hypersensitive to one brand or type of formula, there are also others out there for you to try.Pump
I’m surprised that many don’t know about exclusive pumping. This is what my sister and I do. We pump our milk at scheduled intervals and bottle feed our babies. This process works for us since it provides some structure to the day, gives our husbands a chance to bond with and feed the babies, and in general we couldn’t get our babies to latch right until months after.Combo / Supplement
This is exactly as it sounds and may be the best of both worlds. If you’re able to get your baby to latch, but your supply is low, you can breastfeed during certain times of the day and supplement with formula during others. Another option is to mix formula into your breastmilk. You’ll want to chat with your pediatrician either way if you want to do this, since they’ll be able to advise on how much to supplement with.
Regardless of what you decide on, as long as your baby is fed and gaining adequate weight according to your pediatrician – that’s all that matters. Give yourself some grace and know that whatever your decision is for your baby, it’s the right one.
xo Kris